And the idea was inspired by today's Dork Tower:

I need to create a handle that one can attach to a 2 liter bottle.

I need to make it in 2 versions - a disposable version that uses an adhesive to hold the bottle, and a non-disposable version that straps onto the bottle and can be reused.

I could sell these by the case at conventions...

DAMMIT I need time to sketch these products out. I don't have any...